I spend a lot of time worrying that I'm either too much or not enough. Do you know what I mean? I worry that I'm doing, working, giving too much -- or not enough. That I'm sleeping, thinking, talking too much, or not enough. That I'm too loud, or too quiet. That I'm too forward, or too shy. There is a fine line between:
- tenacious/stubborn
- smart/know-it-all
- honest/insensitive
- assertive/aggressive
- strong/heartless
- compassionate/weak
- helpful/controlling
- persistent/obsessive
- unique/weird
- independent/lonely
- funny/mean
- serious/boring
- playful/obnoxious
- relaxed/lazy
- revealing/embarrassing
- purposeful/relentless
- polite/fake
- cautious/paranoid.
Can't I ever be just right? Neither too much nor too little, but enough?
Balance. Shades of grey, rather than black or white. This is my goal.
7 Comments:
You know, I think it's okay to be black and white in some areas, and grey in others. I think it's especially fine to switch up which is which a good portion of the time.
Never be predictable. And never decide that a certain way to be is "just so."
You are beautiful, complicated, fierce, wise, open, difficult and inspiring all at once, Patia. Just be, and let everyone else figure out how to take it.
That's just my opinion, of course:).
Ohh, thank you, Meg! Just when I was starting to wonder if everyone was out there thinking, "Yeah, you're too much/not enough, all right," but too polite to say so.
So, you mean, it's OK to just be whatever I happen to be at the moment? Even if it's too much or not enough?
Hmmmm.
Ditto to what Meg said. Just do what makes you happy!
I think you're doing great - and I'll 'third' Meg's comments. Nobody is ever 'just right' in every way for anyone. We're all 'too this' and 'too that' and we're all changing - so just when we think we've got it 'just right' everything is different!
So it helps to just take a deep breath (always the first step on the path to 'balance'), and take stock of where you are, how very very very much you have accomplished and how very very very great are your opportunities to continue on.
Then go kick some butt (in a balanced way, of course).
Thank you, Neva and Justin!
J, I am envisioning myself balanced precariously on one leg, kicking butt while shouting "Hai ya!" and trying not to fall over.
Keep in mind that all greys are a combination of red, yellow and blue, not black and white. So, add a third to every pair on the list. Here are some suggestions:
Smart/Know-it-all/Tired
Cautious/Paranoid/Hominid
Polite/Fake/Democrat
Persistent/Obsessive/Republican
You feel better already, right?
Much.
I particularly like the Cautious/Paranoid/Hominid combination.
Kind of goes with that jittery nocturnal-mammal thing.
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