I recently reconnected with my childhood best friend, 15 years after a misunderstanding that neither of us remember very well.
I met L when I was four years old and she was eight; we lived a block apart in San Jose. My family moved to Santa Cruz four years later, but she remained like a big sister to me throughout my teens. She had four brothers who teased, harrassed, wrestled and otherwise treated me like a kid sister. I was an only child. I loved it.
L's brother J is the one who brought L and me back together. He found me on the Internet, emailed, and the rest is history. I can't tell you how good it feels to see their names in my address book again after all these years. But I mourn the lost time, and I know it'll never be the same. We're all grown now, busy. L has a daughter of her own and is caring for two teen boys who tragically lost their parents. J married recently. I cried when I learned their mother died last year. She was always good to me.
L sent me this photo of a painting J painted and that she's had all this time; I never knew it existed until now. It's me at age 13 or 14. In real life, they tell me, I was lying on their living room couch. J's talent for transforming the mundane into the fantastic is evident in the exotic background and dress, the waves in my hair. But the rest of it, I think, is me.
I remember how at age 13 I hated my hips and butt, how I thought I was grotesquely fat. I look at this picture now and see how lovely I was then. And wonder if I will ever be able to see myself as lovely now.
I wouldn't want to turn back time, wouldn't want to give up any of my hard-earned wisdom. But oh, how I wish I could get back some of the things I've lost.
6 Comments:
What a gorgeous painting.
What a gorgeous girl!
That is a beautiful painting! Absolutely beautiful!!
A good portrait ends up capturing the subject’s soul. So, you’ve lost noting. That is a beautiful portrait. It’s great that you reconnected with your friends. It was probably also inevitable.
Has the apostrophe become my trademark? (see above)~,:^)
Stupid smart quotes!
Thanx, Vanx.
And Sharon and Maggie!
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