Patia Stephens :: Missoula, Montana

Hurtling toward my future

Life is going so fast right now, I feel like I'm in a rocket ship. Final presentation Friday, projects due next week, class wrap-ups, teacher conferences, plotting my schedule for next fall. I can't believe I'm nearly halfway through my master's degree. If I can keep up the pace, that is. My adviser today encouraged me to take extra time, stretch it out, but I want to get it done. It's too expensive to dawdle. The less time I spend earning a living, the more money I have to borrow.

And after graduation? Who knows? My dream is to make it as a freelancer, but it's an unreliable way to make a living. Unlike bills, which are probably the most reliable thing in the universe.

Earth Day rant

OK, I know Earth Day is officially over, but hey, every day is Earth Day, right?

Friday the planets aligned and I managed to find both the time and energy to go for a walk along the river. The sun was shining, it was a perfect Missoula spring day, I was in a good mood. Until I saw the bumper sticker. "Plants and animals died to make room for your FAT ASS."

Every time I see this particular bumper sticker, which is fairly often in this town, I want to respond: "Yeah? They died for your skinny rump, too." We all consume natural resources. And you know what? The Jeep Cherokee that this sticker was on probably uses quite a bit more fuel than my Subaru coupe. So does the Volkswagen bus I used to see parked in the University district, hogging up one and a half times the parking space my car takes, while chastising me for the size of my ass.

What most offends me about this sticker is that it's often plastered next to liberal slogans like "Celebrate Diversity" and "Visualize Whirled Peas." These people should know better. But fat is still the last acceptable prejudice, even among progressives. To my mind, this bumper sticker is fat bigotry masquerading as environmental concern. I may have a fat ass, but I also recycle, drive a small car, live in a small house, turn lights off when they're not being used, re-use plastic bags, and lots more. We all do what we can. And it seems to me that unless you have figured out how to live without consuming anything, even plants, then you have no business putting this bumpersticker on your car.

Bird's-eye view of UM campus

The new satellite photos from Google Maps continue to fascinate me. I've always been a map junkie and this satisfies some ancient urge to know the lay of the land, I think. Check out this one of the University of Montana campus. A few highlights (clockwise from upper-left): Adams Center next to Washington-Grizzly Stadium; the Clark Fork River bounded at the top by I-90; Mount Sentinel with the giant M; the UM Oval at the heart of campus.

See the fine lines that trace the edges of Mount Sentinel? If you scroll down (southward), they become even more obvious. These are old shorelines from Glacial Lake Missoula, which filled western Montana during the last ice age some 12,000-15,000 years ago. UM would have been under nearly 1,000 feet of water at the lake's highest point. Mount Sentinel (and Mount Jumbo to the north) were just islands.

Five things I'm digging now

Yahoo 360 -- This is Yahoo's answer to social networking software (like Friendster and Orkut) and to blogging. It's still beta, but I think it has great potential for making technology more accessible to regular folks. I really like that it has privacy settings for its blogs. If friends or regular readers want an invite, let me know.
Munchies -- This stuff is SO much better than Chex Mix.
Ozomatli -- I recently downloaded their album, "Street Signs," from iTunes. Great, catchy, danceable rhythms that sound like Santana mixed with the Black-Eyed Peas. Or something.
Midnite Choir -- I saw these guys performing on the street in Seattle and loved them so much I bought their CD. It's freaky, cheerfully morbid stuff -- think Tom Waits meets Nick Cave meets Nina Hagen meets eastern European waltzes and polkas. No kidding.
Extreme Makeover, Home Edition -- I'm not a big fan of reality shows, except this one. It's become my favorite TV show -- really the only one I'm making a point of watching these days. They take a family with unfortunate circumstances and build them a dream home in seven days. It's so nice to see a show that celebrates kindness.

A milestone of sorts

Today at a faculty/staff awards reception I picked up my five-year pin. I've actually been at UM for nearly eight years, but my student-employee years don't count. Either way you look at it, it's a long time. Fun flies when you're doing time.

The contrariness of plants

I have a Christmas cactus that blooms in October and April. Go figure.

OMG

I have just discovered Google Maps and its satellite imagery. This is incredible! Go check it out!

Monday, Monday

One of my very favorite things in life is that very first sip, first thing in the morning, of an excellent cup of coffee. Mmmm. Mmm!

It was an unusually busy weekend, but I not only survived, I thrived. Among other things, I:

worked six hours at the second annual Glacial Lake Missoula Discovery Day at the Montana Natural History Center. Our seven presenters, numerous volunteers and a small crowd of attendees learned a lot from each other. Did you know that an earthquake fault along the eastern shore of Flathead Lake is due for a third quake in the 7.0 range anytime now?
put in 2.5 hours answering phones for Montana Public Radio Week. In last night's Pet Wars finale, dogs beat cats by only nine points. I demand a recount!
hung out with my friend Gay, who was in town for a workshop, and her friend Colleen, who came along for the ride.
enjoyed meals at the Mustard Seed and Finn and Porter (amazing calamari!) and tried out the new Cold Stone Creamery, which has incredible ice cream.
hired UM students to detail and wax my car and to clean out my flowerbeds. I am learning to delegate and it feels good.
worked on the UM Style Guide revision.

Cat blogging Friday

Since "LitterSweep Ultra" has been the most common search term used to find my site in recent weeks, I guess I'd better get on that product review. (I don't want to disappoint Karen, either.) And then, I promise, absolutely no more scatalogical references for at least six months!

Product review: LitterSweep Ultra
I bought the LSU about three weeks ago after experiencing litterbox "issues" with my new kitty, Luna. She's an absolute doll besides this one thing, so I decided to do whatever it took to accommodate her. While my boy, Tango, couldn't care less what shape the litterbox is in, Luna is extremely fastidious, a real girly-girl. Since I have neither the time nor the inclination to follow both of them around with a pooper-scooper 24 hours a day, I decided to buy an automatic litterbox. I did my research, read reviews of the various Littermaid models and a few other brands, as well. Reviews seemed very mixed -- some people loved them, some thought they were junk. The LitterSweep Ultra was new on the market, and although I couldn't find much on it, the few mentions I did find were positive.

But when I hauled it up to the register at PetsMart, the checker said, "Just to let you know, a lot of people have been returning these. Be sure to save your receipt." Sure enough, I've decided to return it. I really wanted to like it. I've withheld judgment until now, hoping it would grow on me. And the thing is, this litterbox works great -- when it works, which is about half of the time. The other half of the time, it either fails to completely deposit the clumps in the storage container -- bringing them back to the tray and gently laying them down again -- or the red unbalance light comes on when kitty scoops too much litter to one side of the tray. Which is often.

Bottom line: I might try the LitterSweep Ultra again a generation or two down the line, when they've worked out some of the kinks. It has great potential. But 80 bucks is too much to spend on something that only kinda-sorta works.

Two Missoula spring haikus

Sapphire flash
On a branch -- Bluebird? Jay? No.
Plastic Wal-Mart bag.

Warm melting backyards --
University neighborhood.
The scent of dog poop.

Must. Get. Homework. Done.

I have a big project due tomorrow: A "word hoard" for my Lexicography class. Basically, this means an in-depth analysis of at least 1o words. We're talking etymologies, collocations, meanings and more. Fun, fun, fun!

Today's affirmation:

I accomplish anything I put my mind to.

Hey! It's public radio week!

If you listen to Montana Public Radio (and you should), now is the time to pitch in for your share of the airwaves. It's pledge week at Montana Public Radio, which means you contribute whatever you can ($1? $1,000? It's all good.), and in return you get to choose from one of many interesting premiums. Things like homemade cheesecakes, T-shirts, goat manure and fresh Flathead cherries. One of my favorite premiums ever was a dozen beautiful banty eggs -- all gorgeous shades of blue, green and brown -- for a $10 pledge.

So call 243-6400 or (800) 325-1565 or go to the website and pledge your support for one of the things that makes Montana so special.

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